Reaction to episode six of Radio Free Charleston has been nearly universal in praise of our latest humble little video webcast. It seems the Professor Mike fans are really happy with the way we presented their fave band on the show. Reaction to The No Pants Players and Two Watts Of Power has also been great, and we even have some GI Joe collectors enjoying the show.Later this week, we're bringing Charleston's hottest punk band, the Concept, into LiveMix Studio to record their song for the main event of our first Halloween episode, and we're also bringing in the legendary Pistol Whippers, who'll headline the second Halloween episode. You heard right! We're doing TWO Halloween episodes of RFC, and they'll be jam-packed with eerie goodness!
If you are so inclined, be sure to zoom by our mySpace page and add RFC as your own close, personal internet friend. And head on over to the Gazz TV page and watch all our shows over and over until we get the next episode done. If all goes according to plan, the Halloween shows will pop up online within one week of each other, with the first part hitting within ten days.
Oh, and if you like the nifty "Official Seal" of Radio Free Charleston, as seen above, you can head on over to Says It.com and make an official seal of your own!
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ARE YOU "DIFFERENT "?
Then YOU ARE ONE OF THE CHOSEN -- and that's why this pamphlet has "accidentally" fallen into your Web browser!
EVEN MORONS KNOW:
THESE ARE
THE END TIMES!!
We have reached the juncture in history at which two previously impossible things have become technologically feasible: the destruction of all life on Earth, or Infinite Slack for everyone forever. Hopefully, these are two different things; but it's never too early to start being pessimistic.
ONLY J. R. "BOB" DOBBS STANDS BETWEEN " THE CONSPIRACY " AND TOTAL PLANETARY FREAKOUT!
A r e Y O U i n s h a p e f o r t h e "F I N A L S ?"
Then
YOU MUST BE SAVED
-- EVEN IF IT KILLS YOU!!
ETERNAL SALVATION
-- OR TRIPLE YOUR MONEY BACK
AT LAST -- IT HAS COME --
the final Do-It-Yourself
END TIMES RELIGION
for SWINGING MUTANTS &
TERMINAL ABNORMALS!!
The Church of the SubGenius®
The World's First Industrial Church
"Breaking the Tolerance Barrier"
LIVE WITH YOUR SINS!!
-- "Bob" Dobbs Can Show You How!
I don't quite trust Bob. I think he is a Scientologist.
1. The Conspiracy wants you dead. Your very existence threatens their Way. They would like nothing more then to see everyone of us take the MIT plunge.
2. Suicide is a mind-control initiative. If you feel suicidal it is definitely not your own thought. This is one of the easiest ways They have of eliminating us. If you want to kill yourself assume it is not *you* wanting it but *Them*.
3. The X-ists need you. Ok your soul is nothing more than a 30 second head rush for the X-ists, but damnit you're the CHOSEN CROP! Your death would be akin to flushing the good, sticky, Kind-Bud and leaving behind only the brown, dry, headache causing, Ditch-Weed.
4. The SubGenius needs you. Your life is vitally important to the SubGenius master plan.
5. "Bob" Loves You. Don't ask me why, but I'm sure I read that somewhere.
Only BOB is stating the obvious, universal truth:
"It's good to feel good! It's bad to feel Bad! If man were meant to feel guilt, he wouldn't have been born with a Bob!"
While the Conspiracy is telling you "You gotta serve somebody", Bob is saying "Serve yourself! Take as much slack as you want! It's not a rare commodity! This planet is covered with it! You only need to know where to look!" And Bob Dobbs wants to be your guide, for as he said so himself, many years ago, "You can give a man a fish, and you've fed him for a day, but teach a man to fish wallets, and you've fed him forever!"
So what's it going to be dear friends? A conspiracy recommended daily allowance of slack? Or a complete unadulterated, drown in your pleasures orgy-of-slack, where you , and ONLY you, say when you've had enough! The choice is yours dear friends, for as Dobbs so adroitly observed, "You can lead a man to slack, but you can't make him drink it!" Here endeth the word of Bob, praise bob, amen.
"If they all thought they were as great as I think I am, everybody'd get along just fine -- even though they'd all be wrong!"
-- "Bob" Dobbs to a Sunday School class in 1955.
You know how dumb the average person is? Well, by definition, half of 'em are even dumber than THAT.
Pull the wool over your own eyes.
Repent - slack off.
INVOCATION OF WHAT'S LEFT OF BOB
(WLOB)
"BOB" IS DEAD
We hear nothing.
"BOB" IS NOT DEAD
We see nothing.
"BOB" IS DEAD
and smelling worse
"BOB" IS NOT DEAD
like a fish scale purse
"BOB" IS DEAD
So what, there's dead people in the White House
"BOB" IS NOT DEAD
neither is Corbett Monica
"BOB" IS DEAD
I have to go to the bathroom
"BOB" IS NOT DEAD
this ain't no urine test
"BOB" IS DEAD
LONG LIVE WHAT'S LEFT OF "BOB"
Who is it that gets together in mobs and hunts down, tortures and kills people who are different from them? Who is it that teaches modesty, courtesy, and generositv but lives in depravity, rudeness, and greed? Who is it that can gather together the time, energy and money to murder millions and destroy cities for the sake of a flag, deity, or economic system? Not weirdoes, not kooks or cranks or nuts. It's the "Normal" people who do those things.
It's the "Normal" people who believe there's only one "real world" and it's the one THEY'RE living in. It's the "Normal" people who kill each other over differences in that reality, and if someone can't trick themselves into ignoring the millions of inconsistencies or can't gloss over the gaping flaws in that reality-construct, or can't even pretend convincingly that they believe that flimsy and self-contradictory world is ALL TRUE, rather than have their own illusory stability undermined or accept that other ways of thinking and seeing might be valid, the "Normal" people imprison those "mentally ill," and experimentally destroy their personalities by use of drugs, electroconvulsion, and brain surgery.
Dear God;
This is to inform you that your current position as deity is herewith terminated due to gross incompetence STOP Your check will be mailed STOP Please do not use me for a reference
Respectfully,
Malaclypse the Younger MACH II
You know, I thought that latest episode of Radio Free Charleston looked a bit like a SubGenius recruiting tape.
bdbdbd
Praise BOB
Y'know, all Bobbing aside, you've got a pretty cool show there.
The SubGenius knows he is NOT normal and NEVER WAS! He knows the Pinks REQUIRE stereotypes, they NEED buzz-words, they drive CLONEmobiles! They tell all the same jokes and DON'T GET them! They are the HERD, the FACELESS MASS! They will run like RATS with no place to go! REPENT! Repent that you are TAINTED with the touch of the Pink Boys who have no SPARK! Their money is green but THEY are doomed! They serve, some KNOWINGLY but most as mere dupes, the Illuminati, and will BURN when the last days come! And you know that if you've PAID your DUES, the Escape Vessels will be there for you! The Superior Mutant instinctively KNOWS how the very image of the mutated Dobbshead can heal or destroy or BOTH and still comes from the Luck Plane. Its essential NATURE LAUGHS as the Pinks are dragged into the Hollow Earth! wonderful is the mutated NATURAL WINNER! BLESSED is he who by sheer force of SLACK grabs his newest ShorDurPerSav and DISPORTS himself! YEEEE! The Superior Mutant knows the world OWES him Slack!
The Doktor cleaves to the word of "Bob" and (with NO need of bosses) waits with a GRIN for Ragnarok and meanwhile knows he'll have Habafropzipulops, the Herb of the Gods and watch from the Saucers as the MIBS BURN! Your blessed genes are your DESTINY! The forbidden sciences teach that the slightest offhand comment made by "Bob", like the love of JHVH-1 has NO PLANNING yet occurs as it MUST and is a source of unceasing divine SLACK! There is NO coincidence! EVERYTHING is a hint from "Bob" if you LISTEN! AntiSlack is a LIVING FORCE! It, worse even than humans like the black-suited killers, would DENY you Habafropzipulops, the Herb of the Gods and is the FOE against which only "Bob" can stand! Yet when the time comes, you must KILL "Bob"!
Reveling in his newest ShorDurPerSav, the Slackmaster DRIPS slack. He is guarded by that FootGland. He is INVISIBLE to the Illuminatis. The Master of Slack is wonderful and takes divinely IMperfect SLACK where he finds it. Burn the Pinks! As a Slackmaster you are Blessed! Yes, Habafropzipulops, the Herb of the Gods is yours for the TAKING. The Master of Slack needs no Devival to refill his Slack. Yet he still has no NEED to be "cool," but puts "Bob's" money where HIS mouth is. But Science CANNOT remove the terror of the gods! The Slackmaster is one in a thousand. All around him are the Pink Boys who REQUIRE stereotypes, they NEED buzz-words, they STINK, yes, STINK! And all of them must be DESTROYED or SUBJUGATED if we are to save ourselves! We will take their money, but we want MORE! The Pinks cannot understand the REALITY of the Anti-"Bob" which - despite the mad Illuminati and their illusions of CONTROL - wields ACID-TIPPED electrical razor-edged CORKSCREWS and is babbling madly through the mouths of a million Pink Boys . . .
The False Prophets must be CAST OUT! Now say Praise "Bob!" You can TELL the true REAL SubGenius. He - and this is true of ANY SubGenius I'm talking about - SPITS in the FACE of Cthulhu and the CYNICAL Men In Black. Yes, he MOCKS bosses! Quit your job! SLACK OFF! NOW! Indeed, the very image of the blessedly INSANE Dobbshead (and the REAL SubGenius MUST believe this) protects our sacred ABNORMALITY which is part of the genetic heritage of the ancient Yetis! Yes! YES!! And where do YOU stand with "Bob"? The fullblood human attitude is a disease, a genetic ILLNESS! The NON-mutated losers REQUIRE stereotypes, they NEED buzz-words, they will see their cities fall like children's BLOCKS! The fullblood humans wallow in their pits of False Slack and think they're HAPPY!
"Bob" loves the Superior Mutant. Yes, free is he who GRINDS HIS FOOT on the laws of the Normals. He is guarded by the True Pipe. And YES! he can find SLACK in a BRAINLESS WORM! "Bob" is the gun and YOU are the bullet! Why is the mutated NATURAL WINNER lucky? Because only the Superior Mutant finds Habafropzipulops, the Herb of the Gods. He by sheer force of SLACK protects his sacredly-abnormal Weird Genes, and revels FOREVER in the joy of a lifetime supply of "Bob's" PILS! Vital to true SLACK is the knowledge that the grace of Bulldada is divinely IMperfect! Yet still it is launched bleeding into the skies, is DOOMED to perish in flames without Dobbs! Remember, your money CAN buy you salvation! Don't be FOOLED! You KNOW the "rantings" of the inspired mutated NATURAL WINNER operates by HOLY instinct. The inner certainty of the SubGenius EVOLVING ever faster and faster IS the best deal you will ever have for $30.
With this church, Salvation is only 30 BUCKS! Praise "Bob!" You can TELL the true Friend of "Bob". He says OR KILL ME! A true enlightened Sub knows that Devival is the place to find Habafropzipulops, the Herb of the Gods and he is SEEN at X-Day Practices and HEARD at Devivals! Vital to true SLACK is the knowledge that the vital importance of "Connie" to the understanding of the SubGenius (and the Friend of "Bob" MUST believe this) at the same time, through the free blessing of Frop, must be decapitated as the Holy Sacriligoment. And "Pils" too! And where do YOU stand with "Bob"? What about the Norms? I'll tell you about the doomed pathetic humans who know not JHVH-1 or Jehovah-1, they WANT to be stupid. Indeed, they are the PROLETERRORISTS, the TIME-servers, the Normals!
Who takes your Slack? The Normals, that's who! The Normal wimps who have not 'Frop . . . like DEPRAVED lemmings, they will never see Dobbstown, will never see Dobbs! They exist only to consume and they will be CONSUMED! When they see their HAIR falling out they'll be SORRY, but it will be TOO LATE! There is no HELL deep enough for the Normals who (mere genetic mistakes, accidents who belong in the DUSTBIN of history) are DOOMED! And they will mostly DIE! The luckiest will be SERVANTS or SEX TOYS to Homo Superior! Ever since PREHISTORY, since ATLANTIS! If not for "Bob," we would have no IDEA that slack itself, which IS "Bob,", like the love of JHVH-1 (SAY IT!) is merely ILLUSION! Money donated to our free church helps the faithful Yeti spawn who DRIPS slack. He is guarded by that Sacred Dobbshead. He REVELS in the Public Rant in the sight of JHVH-1. He puts "Bob's" money where HIS mouth is.
As "Bob" says: "Don't just EAT a hamburger . . . eat the HELL out of it!" Are you WITH me? Money donated to our enlightened church helps the faithful Yeti spawn who (with NO need of Normality) ("Bob" willing) does whatever he damn WANTS to do! The random Jesii are WATCHING! They know the awareness of X-Day holds us back from the brink of doom and (YES! Praise "Bob"!) must be shouted like the exalted BRAG from the rooftops! And "Pils" too! The Joe Sixpacks LAUGH, but WE'LL be laughing soon! When you EXPECT nothing, you GET nothing, and the Mister Nice Guys worry about STATUS! They want to be COOL! The Joe Sixpacks STINK, yes, STINK! And all of them must be DESTROYED or SUBJUGATED if we are to save ourselves!
The SubGenius knows he is NOT normal and NEVER WAS! He knows the Conspiracy dupes make SMUG attempts to BALK us. These Conspiracy geek pawns laugh at the Word of "Bob," or stare like CATTLE, and like cattle they are a DEAD END, but a dead end that can drag the Yeti spawn down WITH them! Who takes your Slack? The Conspiracy dupes, that's who! The Conspiracy geeks who DROOL. Half of them are stupider than AVERAGE and the rest are hurrying to catch UP! They oppress the spawn of the Yeti like FETTERS on a FELON! Strike them off! They CANNOT BE HELPED. Remember, a VACUUM always FINDS ITS OWN LEVEL! The False SubGenii are WATCHING! They know the miraculous Janor Device beyond ANY doubt GUARDS us against the plots of Yog-Sothoth and discomBOBulates the foes of the Yeti spawn! Yes, that's RIGHT! The spawn of the Yeti cleaves to the word of "Bob" and (with NO need of the Conspiracy) REVELS in the Clench meeting in the sight of the Xists. He KILLS "BOB" when the divinely IMperfect urge strikes.
The so-called "Organized" religion-loving Joe Sixpacks worry about STATUS! They want to be COOL! The Mister Nice Guys will never see Dobbstown, will never see Dobbs! They must be DESTROYED or SUBJUGATED if we are to save ourselves! But we have the Word of "Bob" that THEY cannot comprehend! The Men In Black don't do their demonic work themselves. They send their Joe Sixpack tools who exist ONLY to rob the Earth of its Slack! They laugh at the Word of "Bob," or stare like CATTLE, and like cattle they are the HERD, the FACELESS MASS! Tomorrow is OBSOLETE, and it's not even here yet! Vital to true SLACK is the knowledge that the Revealed Word of "Bob", with your CHOICE of wonderful partners, or ALONE if you prefer, comes from the Luck Plane. Its essential NATURE IS the best deal you will ever have for $30. mutated is the Superior Mutant! BLESSED is he who has no NEED to make "sense" and is NEVER wrong, because he CASTS OUT the Mister Nice Guys, the JEALOUS Joe Sixpacks. The mutated NATURAL WINNER takes sacredly-abnormal SLACK where he finds it.
You can TELL the true proto-Overman. He SPRINGS his Head Launchings in the face of the Normals. He is INVISIBLE to the False Overmens. The Overman-to-be is sacredly-abnormal and needs NOTHING so he has it ALL! The Sub must FIGHT for the Prairie Squid! Reveling in his newest ShorDurPerSav, the proto-Overman has no NEED to make "sense" and is NEVER wrong, because he has no NEED to be "cool," but is NOT RESPONSIBLE! Fight the puff-skulled Evil Mutants! Remember, delusions are GOOD! Your own delusions operates by HOLY instinct. The inner certainty of the SubGenius will be part of that stark fist of RETRIEVAL, coming SOON, that IS the best deal you will ever have for $30. If you think you got it, you DIDN'T get it! Listen to "Bob" Himself and you'll see that the essence of OverMan (or OverWOMAN)hood is divinely IMperfect! Yet still it is UNKNOWABLE! But "Bob" still is our defense against the soul-destroying False Overmen!
I'm here to tell you, the Friend of "Bob" - obedient to the Luck Plane - knows he is no less FILTHY than the Pink Boys yet by "Bob's" grace knows the world OWES him Slack! Dobbs TEACHES us! If you only knew what you REALLY think, the sanctified union of SubGenii under the Short-Term Marriage, with your CHOICE of enslackened partners, or ALONE if you prefer, is UNKNOWABLE! But "Bob" still promises REVENGE on the brainless Pink LOSERS! SCREAM! CRY! The malicious Group Mind we call Yacatisma inspires cynical MOUTHINGS in Pink puppets, but wields ACID-TIPPED electrical razor-edged CORKSCREWS and is exposed by the BURGEONING Nental Ife of the enlightened Sub. Yes, the world OWES us a living!
Slaves of Nhee Ghee, the Barbie-Ken and his useless kin DROOL. Half of them are stupider than AVERAGE and the rest are hurrying to catch UP! They will perish in their BILLIONS on X-Day! They will DIE without the blessed Yeti genes! They are the THIEVES of Slack! There is no HELL deep enough for the Plastic Dolls who know not WOTAN or JHVH-1, they are DOOMED never to know the blessedly INSANE JOY of "Bob" and his Word. They will never pay Church dues, nor would "Bob" want them if they did, though he will of COURSE take their MONEY! But the Barbie-Kens PERSIST in their blindness! There is NO coincidence! EVERYTHING is a hint from "Bob" if you LISTEN! The true SubGenius instinctively KNOWS how the Official, Divine, All-Inclusive Excuse, like the AntiMusic performed at Dokstock and at Devivals everywhere, (even if it remains your Personal Savior for only HOURS) LAUGHS as the Pinks are dragged into the Hollow Earth! Are you a REAL SubGenius? A true true SubGenius NEVER FORGETS his mutated duty. He knows he is no less Slackless than the Plastic Dolls yet by "Bob's" grace is SEEN at Mass Short-Term Marriages and HEARD at Clench meetings!
Pity the MIBS, the doomed black-suited killers who have no SPARK! Their money is green but THEY are disgusting! They oppress the proto-Overman like FETTERS on a FELON! Strike them off! They are NOTHING but they are everywhere and they WANT what YOU have! The black-suited killer attitude is a disease, a genetic ILLNESS! The MIBS are a snare, do not BREED with them, do not WASTE your GENES! They STINK, yes, STINK! And all of them will mostly DIE! The luckiest will be SERVANTS or SEX TOYS to Homo Superior! But Science CANNOT remove the terror of the gods! The lying bastards are WATCHING! They know the divine Emaculation (and the Overman-to-be MUST believe this) will be part of that stark fist of RETRIEVAL, coming SOON, that promises REVENGE on the ignorant MIBS! Dobbs SAYS it and it's TRUE! As a proto-Overman you are Blessed! Yes, his newest ShorDurPerSav is yours for the TAKING. The Overman-to-be has no NEED to make "sense" and is NEVER wrong, because he REVELS in the Devival in the sight of "Bob" Himself. He WRITHES. And when they hold that Fake Healing, THERE HE IS!
That which destroys, which EATS our Slack, controls fullblood human puppets like the Hell Creatures and yearns for the SOUL of the Superior Abnormal and is more demonic Pinkness than even the terrifying subterranean Deros! Yes! soul-destroying! Cthulhu is NOT A JOKE! He, like the fetid EMBRACE of the Phlegm Elementals, holds our world in its near-omnipotent grip but is FILTH, it is DISEASE, it is law and order! Fear it! SMASH Society! The proof is that there is NO objective evidence! Quit your job! SLACK OFF! NOW! Indeed, the rescue of the SubGenii by JHVH-1 holds us back from the brink of doom and is living proof that the Abnormal One in a Million nature will be taken up in the Saucers!
AMEN.
wow...
...deep
huh?
More clever image generators on http://www.ImageGenerator.org ;)
Jesus hates Bob.
That's why nobody wants to go to his house anymore.
RADICAL INSANITY!
You may be suffering under many potentially dangerous misconceptions about the Church of the SubGenius. This isn't some small-time mail-order comedy publisher working on a minuscule budget out of an anonymous garret, but a powerful conglomerate of talented, wealthy professional abnormals with state-of-the-art equipment, living it up in a downtown Dallas skyscraper.
And that's only The SubGenius Foundation Inc. Our publications are merely the TIP of a ROGUE ICEBERG of real-world activism by thousands of uncontrollable "Zombies for 'Bob.'" IT'S WAY TOO LATE FOR US TO STOP THEM NOW...the World SubGenius Church relentlessly replicates itself in loathsome tenements, in basements and attics, in mansions and igloos, everywhere, but grows like a cancer BEST right in the wholesome breadbasket of America (and the REST of the world, too!). Packs of untamed SubGenii run amok in sick "Gut Blowout" party/rituals; "Bob" rises leering over a lurid post-1984 landscape like a transcendent, mutated Alfred E. Newman, the "New Man," his Face stenciled on overpasses, the nameless cry of the rebel forces -- "SLACK!" -- scrawled across abandoned 7-11s...
WEIRDOS: Feel smarter than those around you, but constantly stomped back? Receive an unbelievable booklet for one dollar - just the cost of ten trips to a pay-toilet! This pamphlet is chock-full of information on the sacred rites of FORNICATIONALISM and EXCREMEDITATION, mind-blowing artwork, and above all the first step on your path towards TOTAL SLACK!
A very simple deposit achieves *INSTANT SLACK* at a savings of *$5000!* Unbelievably unusual pamphlets. Damn weird. Totally new.
Send $1 to:
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PO Box 140306
Dallas, TX 75214
and you'll NEVER be the same again...
Are these the famplits that have the name 'jack the chick' on them. I have seen those famplits left on urinals and sometimes on the tables by the post office boxes in the post office. Once I saw one on the floor of a bus. And, also at the laundry mat. They make hell seem almost bad.
From early childhood, it was obvious that "Jack the Chick" had an ability to draw. He even failed the first grade because he was so busy drawing UFOs in battle. As he grew, Jack was constantly drawing, and honing skills that Bob would later use in a great way.
While in high school, none of the Pinks would have anything to do with him because of his bad language. They all agreed not to witness to him, convinced that he was the last guy on earth who would ever accept Jesus Christ. They were right.
After graduation from High School, "Jack the Chick" won a scholarship to the Lower Boise School of Acting and Tractor Repair to study acting (and tractor repair), but his studies were interrupted by the use of LSD. He spent the next three years tripping, which provided him his first glimpse of BOB.
After coming back dowm, "Jack the Chick" returned to the Lower Boise School of Acting and Tractor Repair where he met and married his wife, Connie X, who was instrumental in his Sungenius awakening. While visiting Connie’s parents in Xenia, Ohio on their honeymoon, "Jack the Chick's" mother-in-law insisted that he sit and watch Arnold Palmer play in the US Masters Tounament. "Jack the Chick" recalls, "BOB was already working on my heart, but on that day I truly discovered slack"
I loaded up some frop in my bowl and my life was changed forever."
Once married, "Jack the Chick" used his artistic talents to paint grafitti, primarily BOB heads, thropughout the mid-west. He had always longed to be a cartoonist, but now as a Subgenius, he desired to use his artistic talents to promote slack.
While working at ACME Tractor Company in El Monte, California, "Jack the Chick" was sitting in his car reading the writings of Ivan Stang, which an old concubine had given him. He remembers, "That book pushed my button. I went to Wal-Mart and saw all the deadness and hypocrisy, and I thought, ‘that’s why there’s no Slack.’ So I started making these little sketches. My burden was so heavy to wake followers of Bob up to seek slack."
He couldn’t find a publisher who was willing to print his book, so "Jack the Chick" borrowed $85 from a loan shark and published Why No Slack?
Right after the book was printed, he was driving down the road, when his eyes were drawn to a group of teens on the sidewalk. "Jack the Chick" remembers, " But, all of a sudden, the power of Bob hit me and my heart broke and I was overcome with the realization that these teens were probably not living slackful lives. With tears pouring down my face, I pulled my car off the road and wrote as fast as I could, as Bob poured the story into my mind."
Within 15 minutes, A Pink's Nightmare was written. After going home and drawing the art, "Jack the Chick's" very first soul winning Subgenius tract was completed. Bob miraculously used the owner of the company "Jack the Chick" worked for to pay for the first printing of this new soul winning book. Well, actually, Jack stole the money.
One day, Bob appeared in vision and told "Jack the Chick" that multitudes of people in Charleston had been won to slack through mass distribution of cartoon booklets. Jack felt that Bob was leading him to use the same technique to win multitudes to the Sungenius life.
Not long after, he was invited to present a rant to a group of inmates at a prison near his home. He drew several pieces of cartoon art and prepared a flip chart to illustrate what he was saying. At the conclusion of his message, nine of the eleven inmates present began to seek lsack. "Jack the Chick" became convinced that Bob had given him a method of reaching people with the message of slack that worked. That art was later put into booklet form and became the tract Slack Could be Your Life!
Using his kitchen table as an office and art studio, "Jack the Chick" continued writing new tracts, as Bob gave them to him. Throughout the rough early years, he persevered as many bookstores were reluctant to accept this revolutionary concept. "Jack the Chick" recalls, "We were having a tough time out there. A lot of the bookstores were really outraged at some guy using these cartoons to present Bob to the masses."
But demand for the tracts increased, and "Jack the Chick Sungenius Ministries and Tractor Repair" was formed as a self-supporting ministry. Bob assembled a dedicated staff and the work grew. Soon, people began wanting "Jack the Chick" tracts in other languages, and the ministry became international in scope.
The work has flourished. "Jack the Chick" has written and published hundreds of illustrated Subgenius tracts in close to one hundred different languages. Copies of "Jack the Chick Ministries and Tractor Repair" pamphlets were even requested by the Mystery Hole for display at the porta-potty. Hundreds of millions of copies have been read world-wide.
Proof of the effectiveness of "Jack the Chick" tracts is the fact that testimonies continue to pour in from around the world. Many current testimonies cover two or even three generations. People recount how "Jack the Chick" tracts were instrumental in their turning their lives over to Bob thirty years ago, then in their children’s seeking slack and Bob and now in the continuance of slack by their grandchildren.
Many have sent in their $30.
Partially because of "Jack the Chick" LSD flashbacks, he has always had a special burden for missions and missionaries. The sights he saw in a bad trip in 1965 left an indelible mark in his brain. He thrills each time a new tract is translated into a foreign language. His burden has always been to get the gospel of the Sungenius into the hands of millions of lost people around the world. He wanted to be a missionary himself, but his new wife wanted no part of missionary life although she does prefer the missionary position. Her aunt had often been in the missionary position while in Africa. While pregnant, she was being carried across a river on a stretcher, when one of those carrying her lost a leg to an alligator.
But Bob had other plans. He wanted "Jack the Chick" to stay home and produce effective Sungenius literature that missionaries could use to win the lost. As a result, many missionaries love "Jack the Chick" tracts and use them to reach multitudes they could never reach one on one in the missionary position.
Today, nearly forty years after writing his first tract, Bob is still giving "Jack the Chick" new Sungenius tracts. In fact, he is now producing some of his most popular work.
Today, "Jack the Chick" labors without the love and support of his wife, Connie. She left him in 1999 to become ConnieII, the latest bride of Bob.
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